Part 2: How to Prepare for the Holidays
By now, you probably have begun some sort of preparation for the holiday season, even if it's simply some initial thinking about what you need to do. It's also time to think about what to do to make sure you stick to your recovery during the holidays.
Write It Down
Writing down your problems, anxieties and concerns is often helpful. Just expressing the many racing thoughts which can lead to increased anxiety can help. However, you can also use writing as a proactive problem-solving exercise.
Set aside some time to do the following exercise, a time when you will not be interrupted and when you can start and finish the exercise in one sitting.
On a sheet of paper or your word processor, create three columns. Label the columns with the following headers:
* The Problem
* Why the Problem May Bother Me
* What I Can Do About It
Start by listing every possible situation, person, or anything else which may bother you during the holiday season. Be as specific as you can. In other words, rather than writing, "I'll be depressed," think of the situations or thoughts or interactions which might result in your feeling depressed. Also, try to break down general situations, like "holiday parties." What exactly about parties will bother you? It might sound obvious, but different aspects of parties affect people differently. Maybe you've even decided not to attend any parties, but you'll still have to deal with refusing invitations and the aftermath ("Oh, we had such a great time; why weren't you there?").
As you write down these possible areas of concern, don't underestimate the impact avoidance may have on your emotions and your recovery. It's best to think about what you plan to do now rather than when the situations start coming up. Attending family gatherings, for example, may cause you a lot of anxiety, but how will you feel when you are sitting home alone? It's OK if you feel you must make that decision, but be ready to handle your feelings after the decision has been made.
At the same time you are writing down the areas of concern, you may also think of why these areas will bother you, including how you think you'll feel because of these situations. Be honest with yourself. You might even rate the severity of your emotions in order to best judge when you will be feeling worst.
Also, jot down ways you would like to positively impact people. Think of a few people you would like to encourage over the holidays. Who can you reach out to? Maybe send an early card to a specifc personality that might be difficult a week before you arrive for dinner.
These are just a few suggestions to get you going. Each person has their unique circumstances, but the key idea here is to prepare for the holidays in order to stay true to your recovery.
Tomorrow: Part 3 Solving Your Challenges
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